In this video, Patrick Bet-David explores the nuances of relationships and the winning strategy to get along with anyone.
The easiest and safest approach is to reduce interactions with people to a minimum. It is difficult to offend someone without opening up first. On the other hand, those who you spend the most time with are likely to be hard to get along with for the same reason. The moment you voice your opinions, the probability of someone disliking you increases. Thus, it is impossible to take a stand without losing some people. This is where many choose to dig in their heels, figurately speaking. They stop caring about other people’s opinions of them. While this is good to a degree, it could also be detrimental if taken to the extreme.
Bet-David tells the story of meeting some people for dinner among which was a woman who made it evident, through body language, that she did not like him. The next day, Bet-David’s friend called him saying this woman disliked him for the simple reason he looked like her ex-husband. There was nothing Bet-David could do to get her to like him if she did not change her attitude.
In life there will be three kinds of people. Those who dislike you no matter what you do, the ones who like you unconditionally, and the ones right in the middle. These are the people you can do something to win over.
Humility can go a long way. No one likes to be around someone who is constantly talking about how perfect they are. It can be exhausting. You would be better served complementing others instead and finding an interest in the person you are dealing with. This is one of the main pillars of the book, “How to Make Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie.
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